History Repeats Itself

Most of my friends know I have a habit of dropping my cell phones into vats of liquid. The first phone was fried when it was in the pocket of the shorts I was wearing when I was shoved into a hot tub by a friend. Said friend ended up paying for half of the new replacement phone. I can't remember what happened to the replacement phone, but Stephen ended up giving me a used phone to replace the other one. That one ended up in a glass of water I was carrying at work. So I got a good deal on a new Motorola with a new contract at US Cellular. Here's a pic of that one:

I loved that damn phone. It had the cool buttons so similar to elevator buttons I love so much. But, alas, it too was submerged in liquid. As I was picking up my phone off of the kitchen counter, it slid out of my hand and into the glass of orange juice I had sitting on the counter. I tried to dry it out but to no avail.

So I went to US Cellular the next day to get a replacement phone, not thinking about the fact that I was already in a contract and not eligible for any rebates. The cheapest new phone they had was $179-I wanted a Motorola because I already had the attachments. They didn't have any used ones, so I went home to think it over. The next day I went back, resigned to the fact that I was going to have to pay a large amount of cash for a phone. And in case you were wondering, no, I did not have insurance on my phone. I honestly meant to get it but I kept forgetting. I even looked at other brands to see if there was anything cheaper. No. They were all generally the same, maybe $10 cheaper. So as I hesitantly tell the lady there what phone I want, I suppose she sees the dismay on my face and says "We just got some used phones in, let me go to the back and get them." She comes out with 2 Motorola phones, one was a Rocker for the low, low price of $180. The other was a Red Razr for $125. I asked what was wrong with it. She said "Nothing-someone got it as a Christmas gift and returned it today." I looked in the box and the attachments weren't even opened. So I got that phone. It's the one advertised for donating money to AIDS in Africa. Granted, my money wasn't going to it, but I saved $60. I hope Bono doesn't get mad at me for buying a rehashed phone. Here it is:

It has some cool stuff on it, but I'm not fond of the color red and it doesn't have the cool elevator buttons on it. Oh well-my own damn fault.

On another note-I hope everyones holidays were awesome. And may the New Year bring much happiness and dry cell phones to everyone.

back by popular demand...

For the love of satan, I'm posting another blog. And since it's been a while and my pals keep bitching at me, it's going to be long winded. So here goes...

First off, my brother and I have been working on a brick patio in the back of my house. Here's a collage of the work we've done so far:

Step 1: Dig out the area to be built.
Step 2: Pour in the gravel.
Step 3: Put in rebar.
Step 4: Build the forms and raise the rebar.
Step 5: Pour in the concrete.

The rest will be blogged later on when we get finished. As you can see, it may look like nothing, but it's back breaking work and worth every penny to get someone else to do it. And in this nasty heat, it's twice as bad. This weekend, the bricks will be added-hopefully...

Next thing: hand surgery. I had pain at the base of my thumb for about 6 years, but in the past 2 years, it was progressively getting worse. I decided to see an orthopedic specialist. Dr. Renfree was his name and he was HOT. Anyway, he couldn't feel anything but a small amount of swelling, so he ordered an MRI. That sucked, by the way. And since everyone else thought I was exaggerating, I believe he thought so, too. After he got the results, Dr. Renfree told me it may be a cyst and a small amount of arthritis he would like to scrape off. Eww. I went in a few weeks later to get the first surgery of my life. It didn't suck half as bad as the MRI, except they couldn't find a vein in my hand. After about 15 minutes of poking, I was beginning to think I was a vampire. But Donna and Judy (my nurses, go figure) finally got the needle in and off I went. Surgery was over in a flash, and my nice drugs wore off even quicker. Afterwards, I was informed that it was, in fact, not a cyst and arthritis, but a benign tumor, stuck in between 2 muscles and pushing up against a nerve. It was a first for the hot doctor, so he told my family and I. And here are my battle scars:

The day after my surgery was my last day at Suntrust, the home of many biblethumping, predjudiced, republican, ignorant southern Baptists who predominately reigned from north Knoxville. Glad to be done with that mess, I wore my Tori Amos t-shirt with a picture of a piglet sucking her nipple to work that day. Just to get a reaction. No one even noticed, which is probably a good thing, because they would have reported me to the local authorities for even suggesting beastiality. On to Clayton I go...

My 2 week training class at Clayton was taught by none other than my ex boyfriend's mom, Blossom. Which was cool, because we like each other. However, before I started, she asked Janet (who has worked at Clayton for a few years) why my name wasn't on her roster for the training class. Janet informed her it was under Elizabeth, not Paige. So, of course, it should have made Blossom think... At the end of my first week of training, she was talking about her grand daughter, who is one this year. Someone asked aloud "What's her name?" Blossom answered "Cyan Elizabeth". Hmmm...I wonder if Darin's wife knows that their child bears my first name? Strange, indeed. In any case, I went through my first weeks at Clayton with a big bandage on my hand, which came off shortly before Bonnaroo. And on to my next story...

I couldn't seem to coordinate an appointment with Dr. Hottie to remove my stitches. And I certainly wasn't going to Bonnaroo, with all the dirt, dust, sweat and whatever else would be floating around at the 700 acre farm in Manchester, TN. So I removed the stitches myself the night before the trek to concert central. Which was a good idea-after arriving at Bonnaroo (it started on Thursday, Renita and I left on Friday) and driving to our campsite, I saw that it was going to be a nasty weekend. We had to park at the VERY BACK. It was 90+ degrees and even lathered in 30 proof sun block, I got burnt. Half a mile to the port-a-potties, around 5 miles to the entrance of Centeroo. Check out our trek:
That was about 2 miles down from our campsite. The rest of the walk was on gravel paths, which aren't fun to walk on wearing Birkenstocks. By the time the first day was over, I had blisters on my feet. Thank goodness I had brought a pair of flip flops. The first band we saw was The Roots. FUCKING AWESOME. They did a version of Bob Dylan's "Masters of War" that brought tears to my eyes. We couldn't see much, but when you have awesome music-who cares? Here's the main stage: Afterwards, we walked around for a while, the smell of weed floating through the air at full speed, anticipating one of the main bands we were there for: TOOL. Holy shit, it was PHENOMENAL. Every note, every vocal, every drum beat PRECISE. Again, we couldn't see much (which is a shame, because I'm in love with Maynard James Keenan) but they had a laser show that rocked. This doesn't even begin to show the excellence of it, but you get the drift:

The next day was Ween (after we slept in the Brooers Tent for most of the day). Superior. There was even an older man next to us, no shirt on, sweating his balls off while dancing non stop and singing every lyric. It was a sight and I have a small video of it, tee hee hee. That night was the Police. It was actually a big let down, although Stewart Copeland was the ABSOLUTE SHIT. Sting fucked up and they left the stage 20 minutes early. Boo. The next day was Pete Yorn who was not only his hotass self, but performed better than his albums sound. He only played for an hour, but damn it was fantastic. After that, it was homeward bound. 2 days of no shower, peeing in stinky port-a-potties, eating exorbitantly overpriced nasty food, drinking gallons of water, sleeping in a hot tent and inhaling so much smoke from all the joints being enjoyed, we were almost high ourselves. Oh and the naked girls running around in full body paint. It was an experience, but I was glad to be home.

My hand has healed quite nicely, my job is interesting (I still hate working however) and I'm looking forward to a vacation next year, maybe going out west to visit Maynard Keenan's vinyard in Arizona:
Or somewhere just to get the hell out of Knoxville for a while. Who knows. But I promise I will try to post more, now that my life has settled down somewhat.

nothing new.

I have no reason for not posting. I have been lazy the past week because the weather has been like a roller coaster-in the 80's one day,40's the next. For 4 nights straight, it was below 30 so, needless to say, everything froze. Everyones flowers and bushes died. I put my potted plants in the laundry room, which saved them, fortunately. Brad and I did manage to get the rest of what was left of the shed out of the yard. However, I am boring myself just typing this, so I'll move on to something else.

My famous person obsession for the moment is Sawyer (Josh Holloway) from LOST. He is some major eye candy and his character on the show is from Knoxville (Josh is actually from Georgia, so his accent is similar). I have to have someone to fantasize about-next month it will be someone else. What's in my imagination is about the closest thing I'll get to a real man at this point. I'll share the vision with you:


He's a hot motherfucker-too bad he's married. Not that I had a chance anyway. Who cares. Renita likes Jack (Matthew Fox), but he does absolutely nothing for me and his character has the personality of a rock. I do like his teeth, though.

We're going to see 'Aqua Teenage Hunger Force: Colon' on Friday. Oh, and girls, if you haven't seen 'Casino Royale' yet, I highly recommend it. It's an awesome 007 flick, but even if you're not into that, Daniel Craig is a panty wringer for sure. Let me show you:

I also suggest 'Layer Cake', which he is also amazing in. Boof. Other movies I watched this weekend were: 'Borat'-I laughed my ass off; 'Sherry Baby'-somewhat depressing, although Maggie Gyllenhaal did show her boobs freely throughout the movie; 'Children of Men' I will watch tonight or tomorrow. Other than that, my life is boring at the moment. I guess that's my reason for not posting...

good reasons why i haven't posted.

I have been a very busy girl. When I say I have been "working in the yard", I mean it literally. There's no dilly dallying like picking up a weed here and there. The past week has been nothing but hard labor from the moment I get home to the moment the sun goes down and by then, I don't feel like posting a blog or calling my friends or even having a beer at UJ's. If you don't believe me, let me show you...

First, I planted many seeds which, by the way, isn't for the impatient. Here, you see zucchini, cucumber, bell pepper, jalepeno, green onion and tomato plants; cilantro, rosemary, dill and basil herbs; lily of the valley and clematis, grown by roots. After the last frost, I will plant them in my yard.

After that, I cleaned out my flower beds around the laundry room, which was no easy task-it had not been touched in over a year and was overgrown by grass and weeds. I cleaned them by hand and afterwards, had blisters on my hands to show for it. My mom came over and we made a plan for the flower garden, involving many bulbs and roots to be planted. The side bed is finished. I'm doing the back bed tomorrow.

Raking the yard was a feat in itself. It hasn't been raked since I've lived here. I simply just mowed over them and left the leaves against the fence to rot. That was a bad plan, obviously, so I decided to take care of it once and for all. It took 3 hours one day to rake the side and 4 hours another day to rake some of the front and take all of the leaves to the front ditch. I gave up halfway through the front yard because the grass was too high and I was butt tired. What you don't see is all the brush I cleared out on the side of the house. That little piece caused a bit of poison ivy on my forearms. I was on the lookout for it, but the little bastards were hiding. However, I did find a ton of forsythia back there which should be beautiful next year, since it had been mowed over previously.

I still have alot to do-I have taken most of what was left of the shed base apart. When that is done, it all needs to be taken to the dump and I will then plant my vegetable garden in its place. I have to take all of the stones up behind the laundry room and clean it up for the patio project Brad and I are beginning soon. I also bought a weeping willow to plant-the last one died but I am determined to have one before I die. The house needs to be pressure washed and the flower beds in the front need to be rid of the wood chips and replaced with mulch. All but the patio will be done by myself. Whew. Not bad for a single girl, huh?