things to do below sea level.

My friends and I leave for Amsterdam and London on December 29. Here's a rough itinerary of what we will be seeing while we are spending New Years in Amsterdam:

The VanGogh Museum

You can get in free here if you're under 12-or if you have one ear. Go figure. Van Gogh is my favorite painter, so this stop is the most anticipated for me.

Anne Frank House

I must admit I have never read Anne Frank's diary, but the house is a huge part of history. And it's background is more intriguing than any American history. It is definitely a must see.

Paradox

A coffee bar that is cozy and also serves food, which is rare for a coffee bar in Amsterdam. I may partake in the legal substances there, although it makes me either paranoid or laugh so hard I can't breathe. And since the place has food, well-they may not have any left by the time I walk out of the door. But I am ready for some goodass coffee, not the Americanized crap that is served at Charbucks. The owners of the bar are apparently really nice and patient with their customers.

Bananabar (Bananenbar at #37)

The one and only reason for going to this bar (open only at night) is the complete irony of it all. I'm a straight girl-my friend Jerry is a gay man. We'll go into this bar to see nude women perched upon the bar, serving drinks. No touching allowed, but they will serve you a banana any way you like. I wouldn't touch that banana with a 10 foot pole, much less eat it-and neither would Jerry (who said that if she had a yeast infection, people would get banana bread)-but I can't imagine anywhere in the world where I could see such entertainment. Disgusting, yet fascinating. Kind of like driving by a bad car wreck.

The Heineken Brewery

It's the Heineken Brewery . That should be enough.

Also on the list are some random churches, windmills, canals and all that touristy crap. All I want to come out of that place with is a pair of wooden shoes and a hangover. London is a different ballgame-we'll have more time to spend there and the only major thing we have planned is a drive to Stonehenge. I'll keep you informed. Now I must go pack for the weekend at the cabin.