fat monday.

I feel as though I could give birth to an alien at any moment. I have eaten since I woke up this morning, with a break to take a nap. It seems like I would know better by now. Today was our gift exchange at work-along with giving gifts, everyone also brought food. Two LONG tables worth of junk food from which I picked at all day. I think I may gag myself and get it overwith.

On Mancow this morning, he gave the calorie and fat count of certain alcoholic beverages, one being the Long Island Tea-700+ calories and 44 grams of fat. I find that hard to believe-if this was true, I would have had a massive heart attack on Friday night after consuming 4 LIT's. It would also mean that this specific drink has more fat than alfredo sauce, which is quite possibly the most fattening thing you could eat besides pure lard or a tub of Crisco. I'm gonna have to do some research. This did not brighten my Monday.

Random thoughts in my head:
Jimmy Pop is a lyrical genius.
Matthew McConaughey is an arrogant asshole.
Whatever happened to Paula Cole?
I really need to clean my house before company comes in this weekend.
I hope the fuckwads that stole all of my CDs are enjoying my Church, Jamie Cullum and Tori Amos collection.
Why would anyone WANT to work at the Waffle House?

Ok, I'm literally about to pop. I'm one more wafer thin mint away from combustion. Wish me luck.